


falling apart

by ahale



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/No Comfort, M/M, Reggie needs a hug, Sad Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms), bi reggie peters, pan luke patterson, ruke - Freeform, ruke if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:22:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28446096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ahale/pseuds/ahale
Summary: Reggie was drowning, and all he could do is hold his breath until it’s all over.
Relationships: Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie Peters & Alex Mercer, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson, Luke Patterson/Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 73





	falling apart

**Author's Note:**

> i’m thinking about making this a longer story <3

It’s like he was drowning.

Reggie never would’ve thought that ghosts could still feel the way he did. They don’t need air, but somehow, it was as if he was gasping for air at every chance he got before being devoured by waves of worry and sadness. As soon as he managed to get to the surface, he was pulled back down in an endless cycle of self destruction.

It all started with his parents, really. The years of neglect and screaming matches took a toll on him. The way his mother would walk out the door, leaving him to deal with his drunk father alone. It was in the way that he wasn’t enough to make his parents stop fighting. It made him feel like a burden, it make him close himself off when he gets emotional. But, the one thing he hates the most is how it makes him feel completely alone in a room full of the people he cared for most.

It eased up once he met Luke, Alex, and Bobby. They made him feel whole again. As he got closer and closer to the group, he allowed himself to tell them about his home life. After that, they always made sure he felt wanted. Bobby would leave snakes and blankets in the studio for when Reggie needed a place to go. Alex’s way was words, reminding Reggie about things from how talented was to how much they care about him. Luke, who he’s been in love with since he was fifteen, showed him how much he cared through touch. It was small, lingering after a group hug or throwing an arm around him during movie night. It felt like pure bliss to feel loved for once.

The bliss didn’t last long after the day Luke and Alex came into the studio holding hands. Reggie’s hear shattered as he watched their hands. They swore nothing would change between the band, but they were wrong.

They started hanging out with each other during their free time. They would invite Bobby along, but left Reggie to overthink about why he wasn’t invited either. A part of him things, maybe they found out his feelings for Luke. Another part of him thinks he’s the problem. Bobby started seeing some girl from school, her taking up all his free time as well. Reggie was the odd one out, an all too familiar emptiness settling in the pit of his stomach. 

Luke and Alex broke up, yet they still treated Reggie all the same, leaving him out. So, he did what he knew best to do; he pushed away. He put on a fake smile, pretending everything was fine.

But, then they died. 

They died, and Reggie had to watch the life fade out of both his friend’s eyes. He laid there, waiting for his turn as the emptiness grew stronger. They stayed in the dark room for 25 years, somehow meeting a girl named Julie. 

Suddenly, Luke and Alex started including him again. He put his guard down, thinking things were going to be different. Alex and Luke are all he has. Even if he can’t have Luke in the way he wants him, having him as a friend was more than he could ask for. He felt the same way for Alex, but more platonic. They were his best friends, but he wasn’t theirs.

Then Luke had Julie and Alex had Willie. Again, he was left on the sidelines. He faked a smile and pushed through it until the empty feeling eats him alive- or well, dead.

Even in a room full of the people he cared about the most, Reggie has never felt more alone. He stared his friends, who were doing their ow. thing around the studio. 

Alex and Willie were going through a few magazines as Julie and Luke work on something that he assumes is a new song. He sat and watched.

He longed for Luke to look at him the way he looks at Julie. He longed for his friends to invite him out with them. He longed for the laughter, the jokes, the music that he had with his best friends. He longed for them to be there for him, for them to love him as much as he loved them. He longed for his best friends, for the times he spent with them. But most of all, he longed for the day his emptiness kills him. 

Silent tears roll down his cheeks as he looked on. He wants to scream, cry, get them to understand that he’s there too. Instead, he keeps his mouth shut. He begged for them to look up, for them to notice him crying. He hoped they’d see his cry for help, making sure he knows he’s cared for. He does what he’s only ever known; he pushes away until they’re out of sight. 

Reggie was drowning, and all he could do is hold his breath until it’s all over.


End file.
